![deathspank cell phone for orphan deathspank cell phone for orphan](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/b2/b5/d7/b2b5d7e884203096d6a1f2b1f6b2e97b.jpg)
You play as detective John Tanner, a maverick cop with a sassy black partner, a death wish, and a fondness for cars that make him look like a dick. You're some nerdy jackoff whose probably procrastinating too much.
#Deathspank cell phone for orphan driver#
Driver as a series has generally left me lukewarm but I really like Driver: San Francisco, so I guess that means I am gay, after all. And yet, there's just no getting away from it.
![deathspank cell phone for orphan deathspank cell phone for orphan](https://i.imgflip.com/2jpnsy.jpg)
And while I'll play driving games, they have been seeming a wee bit redundant lately when a game like Grand Theft Auto can have all the features of a driving game but also lets you get out of your car and kick elderly women to death. It's basically just a bunch of dudes sittin' in heavily sponsored armchairs for two hours. Motor racing as a sport has none of the celebration of physical ability that makes, say, women's gymnastics fun to watch. I mean, as much as this may cause me to forfeit my rights to a scrotum, I've never found cars particularly engaging. Do you wanna hear something crazy? Titty fuck Labrador swimming up the Nile.ĭo you wanna hear something crazy but also coherent? Julia Roberts was once hospitalised for swallowing an entire vole.ĭo you wanna hear something crazy but also coherent and true? Driver: San Francisco may end up being in my top five of the year!Īnd no one is more suprised by this than I, I assure you.